April 15th, 2010: Miabella Foxley

April 15th, a day of deadlines.

I picked April 15th so that I could write about being 30. I thought it was fitting, not only as the day after my birthday, but American tax day as well. The deadlines would make a great parallel. Deadlines to grow the heck up, figure out what to do with my life, the perfect time to give up video games and do something….

Does age make you mature? I feel mature, and at the same time I cling to childish things like a security blanket for my comfort. It’s silly and selfish, really.

SL was never a business; it was always a form of escape. Whether it be fulfilled through creating, keeping busy, relationships… (I guess this is where I insert some educational reference to drug dependency and always searching for that high you once felt.)  I’ve exhausted myself looking for that satisfaction I once had.

I don’t really consider myself a member anymore, so I wouldn’t classify this as some great departure. I had hoped time would change my feelings towards SL but it will never be something healthy for me. For too long I’ve depended on it for all the wrong reasons. I’m not trying to give the impression that SL hasn’t and isn’t a blast at times… but the dynamic (for me) has changed. I partially blame this on that tiny annoying voice in my head telling me there are RL things that I’m trading as the clock ticks away in the upper right hand corner of my screen.

This doesn’t feel dramatic or ‘emo’ though, I’m only putting head thoughts down into words. I feel great that I can move on. I want to celebrate it.  I have taken SO many amazing things from my 3 years in SL. I have amazing relationships with amazing people who I wouldn’t trade for anything. I have made “BEST friends”. I know that our RL friendships have no dependence on a virtual world.

So here we are, April 15th, 2010… deadline.

P.S. Riq Graves has informed me our friendship relies on my mentioning how AMAZING he is, as both a man and a philanthropist.

____________________

Miabella Foxley is “On The Pursuit Of Happiness and I know everything that shines ain’t always gonna be gold, I’ll be fine once I get it; I’ll be good.”

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One Response to “April 15th, 2010: Miabella Foxley”

  1. Daila Holder Says:

    I feel you. Keep on keeping the main thing the main thing.

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