July 23rd, 2010: Meila Solo

Here I am, for the fifth day sitting in this hospital bed. I haven’t slept yet because the pain is just unbearable. The epidural is doing nothing for me and all I can do is cry and scream. Tears of not only pain but the emotional scar I am going to hold with me for the rest of my life. All of a sudden I felt a really sharp cramp in my lower area. I tell my mother, (who flew down to Texas from Boston to be there for me), so she goes and finds a nurse to check on me. The nurse who is in training walks in to check on me, sees nothing out of place and nothing wrong. I’m not happy with this answer so she gets the other nurse. She simply says, “We’re going to call the doctor, you are ready.”

I was in labor for five grueling days. These were the five worst days of my life. In these five days my whole life turned around… I lost my son, I went into cardiac arrest once and I became severely anemic. Three years ago today, at 11:45AM, I was giving birth to my first son. Three years ago today, at 11:46AM, I was mourning my son’s death.

I have moved back to Boston with my family.
I am no longer with the father.
I now suffer from depression.
I have anemia.
I lost 60% of my hair.
I do like to say ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ to myself, even if you don’t think I am .

Also, I will not move my son’s urn from my shelf, I am not ready.

I appreciate finding Second Life. I wouldn’t be here today writing this if I didn’t. I wouldn’t have met such wonderful friends if I’d have done the things I wanted to do. I am so very grateful for the friends I met in Second Life who have been there for me more than my real life friends. Today is easier because I have you guys.

____________________

Meila Solo is a 24-year-old female residing in Boston, Massachusetts. She is a teacher and cat owner. She enjoys spending time in her small store in second life and blogging on her blog, Slaholic. She is partnered to a wonderful person in-world but single in real life. She also really enjoys eating chicken.

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10 Responses to “July 23rd, 2010: Meila Solo”

  1. KawaiiNicole Piers Says:

    Such a touching story. I’m glad to have met you in Second Life!!

  2. Amaliscious Destiny Says:

    I love you forever Meme. I’m so proud of you for writing this. <3
    Mama Ama

  3. Litzi Xue Says:

    Honored to know you Meila <3

  4. Ashe Anthony Says:

    Meila, you are a very strong person for wanting to share something so personal.
    I just want to really want to hug you :D

  5. Ashe Anthony Says:

    And you are also a great friend as well <3

  6. thebunnygirl Says:

    i love you.

    <3

  7. AshleePSU Snoodle Says:

    We are so lucky to have you as part of our group of weirdos. You are an amazing lady.

  8. Adie Says:

    So honored to know you and have you as my friend and neighbor. You are a phenomenal person!!! I am a little confused however, because it says you like chicken but I thought you liked hot dogs :p

  9. FionaRose Bartavelle Says:

    I’ve only known you through plurk, but this two-threesixfive post is touching *hugs*

  10. Mai Moonwall Says:

    what more can I say? ❤ hugs!!!

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