November 5th, 2010: Miaa Rebane

 

My birthday was this weekend. Few years ago, my birthday was the day I looked forward to most. It’s not the same anymore.  There are so many things I want to write about today but my mind keeps coming back to my Dad. My Dad – the last person I blogged about, the last entry in my journal, the person who made our family complete.

This is a letter to my Dad.

Dear Dad,

I’m ready to write this letter to you now that you’ve been gone for six years. I know you don’t like me getting over emotional but I have to let it out. Forgive me.

What I’ve realized since you left is that you were there for me – always.  Do you remember, when we were in India and I fell down the staircase falling unconscious? I remember waking up in your lap on our way to hospital. I saw you tearing up Dad.

I remember your hands, I remember your strength. I remember you holding me as a child and saying it’s ok. Just feeling the strength of your arms around me was a comfort. No words had to be spoken.

Do you know that Mom knew that you were calling me 5 times a day :) when I was away from home although you told her you didn’t.  She used to tell me how upset you were when I wasn’t around. She tells me that she used to force you to come for a walk to take your mind off things.

You never got to see the flowers I got for you on your last day.  They were your favorite – white chrysanthemums.

Dad, I really miss you every day. I love you and I know that you knew how I loved you. I wish I had told you more often. I couldn’t say my goodbye. I never got a chance to say my goodbye coz I had to be strong for Mom.

I will always miss you, and hope to see you one day in the big sky up there.

Goodbye Dad.

Until we meet again, Love you always.

Your only daughter.

<3

____________________

Miaa Rebane is a 27-year old User Interface Designer in RL who is doing her Masters from University of Maryland. In SL, she is a model and founder of Projects Tents for Haiti who lives with her partner Takeshi Kiama in Costa Rica SIMs.

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8 Responses to “November 5th, 2010: Miaa Rebane”

  1. Summerkat Says:

    *Hugs* it is very touching and I think that many of us can relate to our fathers. This made me tear up and I miss my father too. Beautiful letter Miaa, thank you for sharing.

  2. Natasja Schumann Says:

    *hugs* reminds me of my mum…stay strong mate! and happy belated birthday! <3

  3. MagicMirror Fayray Says:

    So sweet of you Miaa..i am all tears!!! I lost my father when i was 8 years old (now im 32) and i wish i’d be at least as lucky as you to have known my father better. I have unclear memories about him but i know him from what people have told me about him. I missed him everyday..still miss him a lot. I missed to call someone “dad”, i used to call dad all the fathers of my colleagues and i always told them not to talk bad of their fathers because they dont know how it is to live without them.

    Hat off infront of you..u made your father so proud of you!! We will meet them someday in that better world up there!

    Hugs u tight sweet dear xoxoxoxoxo

  4. Thalia Heckroth Says:

    You just brought tears to my eyes. I can totally relate, my Dad has been gone for 6 years too. Hugs to you Miaa and Happy Birthday.

  5. joe selby Says:

    I teared up reading your post, so moving. “Oh, how beautiful” were the first words that came to my mind. tc

  6. Sabine Mortenwold Says:

    Miaa,

    This was so lovely and so well written. I really understand how you feel. I was not there when my dad died many years ago from cancer and didn’t really get to say goodbye. Thankfully I was there with my mom just a few years ago. My mom and I have the same b-day so it is always hard. I know though as you may that despite the fact that we can’t see them and touch them they are still there for us in many ways,

    I know he would be proud of the lovely talented person that you have become.

    Hugs,

    Sabine

  7. Nave Fall Says:

    /me falls into reverie……………….

    Thank you Miaa, you are the epitome of things and people I like in SL

    I’m just

    Nave Fall

  8. Kaycee Says:

    just beautiful :)

    i lost my mom almost ten years ago and a day doesnt go by that i dont think of her and miss her. i know that feeling all too well …..

    kc

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